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Day #15: Where does the time go

Remember that time I said I was going to write every day and capture the memories of virtual schooling? Well, that was much easier before virtual school actually started. I thought I would have all this time to get our health back on track, lose 20 lbs, write the book, run the most tip top home and virtual school possible, and on and on.

The truth is, it looks much more like this.......

Somedays though it feels like quicksand, slowly pulling me into the depths of which I shall never return. Losing my self, my mind and unable to move - given the cognitive load of doing it all and wondering what grade I will be receiving in this season.

Somedays it bliss, heaven. Midday cuddles, cider mill adventures, 8th grade PE, 3rd grade math and science, virtual lockers, 7th grade meme generation. We are all learning and growing and navigating together.

I am closer than I have ever been to what my children are learning, helping them to overcome roadblocks, challenging them to conquer new frontiers, celebrating their wins. No longer am I consoling a crying little lady via FaceTime from Tokyo - my heart breaking along with hers but too far away to really make a difference. No longer boarding a plane to Dublin to celebrate a great test score or making a team - too far to twirl and dance with them. I am living it, in and out, all the bads, all the goods, and forever banking the memories on my heart.

What I have learned: When we become adults we no longer invest in playtime, our creativity stalls, and trying new things seems insurmountable. Responsibilities shackle us to norms and schedules, keeping us from capturing the Joy we deserve. They are inspiring me to pause, take time, try something new. As I learned in 7th grade science today, the brain gets stronger the more you challenge it and if you don't it atrophies. Stop cleaning - grab your hoverboard and hit the park in the middle of the day. Playing your favorite song until you know every single word at the top of your lungs on a sunny fall Jeep ride (Zombies2, Hamilton). The corn maze is about adventure and exploration - not about conquering it as fast as possible. Rules don't need to apply when decorating for Halloween - it is never too early.

Hacks to share:

Buy a mandolin. Mine is from 1982, a gift from Grandma Mac, ordered off QVC with the receipt still in the box to prove it. I buy all the fruits and veggies and if I slice and dice them into fun shapes and put them in fun containers these kiddos will eat them up.

Move your body, all of you. Our best memories so far are times we danced to Spooky Scary Skelton like 90 times one morning, did Yoga and Sit-up workouts together

Family Time still matters most. Even though we have been locked in together for 7 1/2 months and still spend all days together. We STILL make space for family time - dinners in outdoor restaurants, drive in movies in our own driveway or the screened in porch, park trips, board games and listening to stories about their day.

So I am going to give myself grace, and as I now know that my passion to daily journal was noble but not sustainable. I will continue to share mom hacks and coaching and book reviews, but without the pressure to deliver every day via long form. Check me out @brandnewdaywithstaceyk for more regular updates.

xoxo, Stacey K

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